words you don't want to hear

On an effort to become more healthy this year, I've kept up with annual doctors checkups. The dreaded paps-mere, physical with blood testing just to make sure everything is in check, and my first ever dermatologist and skin care appointment.

I'm in my late 20s and have lived with four moles and countless freckles my entire life. My moles have never itched, became red, or anything out of the ordinary, so I walked into this appointment a lot less nervous than I normally do with doctors.

If you've never been to a dermatologist let me fore warn you that they see more than you OB/GYN does. They will open every little crevice they can find, including in between your toes, just preparing you now...

She started at the top of my head. Moving every strand of my hair sprayed hair, then went to the bottom of my feet. She then went to my back side where two of my moles reside (upper back area) and stopped. She was poking and prodding and my gut went to the top of my throat. Nausea set in and so did the butterflies in my stomach.

She told me that both of my moles looked abnormal and much darker than they should. She strongly suggested that she remove a piece of each to have them tested. Of course I said yes, and I am being 100% honest in saying I didn't feel a thing, not even the needle used to numb the area.

After it was said and done (which took all of 60 seconds for both) not only were a piece of them gone, but the entire mole itself. She cut both of them clear off. I was fine with it.

She told me that they would call me in one week which of course only allows my nerves to set in for the next several days. She explained that they are most likely fine, then proceeded to hand me a pamphlet on melanoma...nice, real nice.

My doctors office is only 10 minutes away from work so I went ahead in. BIG mistake, HUGE, in the words of "Pretty Woman." I got in before my boss. Turned my computer on to start the day and that's when Tarl called to see how the appointment went. The emotions and anxiety set in and so did the tears. Something about the voice of someone you love makes everything come crashing down. At that moment I heard the back door unlock and my boss came in to see me at my desk drenched in tears.

After a polite, "are you OK?", I ran to the bathroom, cleaned myself up, came out and told him that I needed to take the day off. He willingly and happily obliged and going home for the day to spend it with Cadence was just what I needed to calm my nerves.

Spending the day with that sweet girl calmed every anxious bone in my body, because as long as she is healthy, the rest just doesn't matter. Whatever outcome the doctor gives me regarding the health of my skin, we will get through it.

I ask that you keep me in your prayers and that I will one day look back on this and laugh that I over exaggerated and hopefully it will be nothing at all. Just two moles that are no longer a part of me.

Once I got home Cadence and I spent the rest of the day outside on the farm. We checked on the garden which has flourished and also gathered some fresh farm eggs.

The baby kittens are beyond precious. They are my parents and Tarl says "no more pets" so we go visit and take lots of cute pictures.

Rosie, our new chihuahua, has captures our hearts with her cuteness, but in keeping it real, she pissed on our bed the second night we had her, no more bed snuggles for that little chi, sorry Ro...

My nephew played in a talent show last night, so we put on our new dresses (which of course I didn't get a full shot of) and went to cheer him on.

I'm loving my $12 Walmart Maxi and am loving the price even more! Pictures soon, promise!

I also bought these amazingly comfortable mint skinnies for $11 - score! Loving me some Walmart right now and I'm not afraid to admit it! Holla!

I plan on going back to get a peach color and a pink color. They are stretchy, comfy, cute and a price tag to match.

Happy Hump Day!